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Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Why Is Having Kids A Good Idea?

I have never understood why having kids is a good idea. I don’t mean the act of making the kids, that just kind of its own reward. I mean like those people on TV that Pride themselves on creating a herd of children. Maybe its just me but the creation of children seems like the most self centered thing you can do. Its like thinking your so great there just has to be more of you. At the core of every person that has children by choice must believe this on some level. I have been trying to figure this one out for years now, it leaves me speechless but out of courtesy I still say congratulations whenever someone tells me that they’re pregnant without tears in their eyes.

I believe the coming water shortage is directly connected to children, or more specifically the amount of people on the earth. Its simple, people are made of water and the more people you have the less water is going to be available. See, kids are making me thirsty and my lawn ugly. I don’t think we should take it out on kids but on the parents of kids that don’t contribute to society. If your kid becomes a stripper then you should get punched in the face and be given all the diseases your stripper kid has. If your kid becomes a teacher then that’s when the government should give you a bit of a kickback for making the world a better place. But if your kid becomes a criminal, then you both get the death penalty for wasting so much precious water.

I always thought I didn’t like kids until one day when I saw a rowdy kid get slapped. I thought it would satisfy me but the thing I learned is that I don’t dislike kids I dislike stupid adults that feel the need to reproduce.

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