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Sunday, June 25, 2017

Why Would U Say That? The Podcast- #90 Improvise Shmimprovize

In this episode its like the good old days because I sit down with Ruben Bueno and we have a weird conversation.  We start out this episode talking about the things i would do for chocolate.  We also talk about Mike Berbiglias movie "Don't Think Twice."  Somehow this conversation turned into talking about being fat and fat camp.  We also talk about the very strange things that poor people do and our experienfes doing them.  I tell my Sonora Caves story about how bad it was and Ruben talks about his Carlsbad Caverns experience. After t hat we talk about improv and our opinions of it. 
Dont forget to like Tilted Halo Comedy and subscribe to the podcast.

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Why Would U Say That? The Podcast- #79 Brass Willy w/ Mike Suarez and Anthony Chavarria

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In this episode of WWUST Me and Anthony sit with Special Guest Mike Suarez and this one gets weird right out of the gate! Mike Suarez is always a blast to have on the podcast! We start out talking about my family and the weird things that go on.  Then we spend some time on talking about transformers and how far that love will take me... Spoiler alert, it turns out its pretty far.  The guys then learn the family legend of Willys dad.  After this we then talk about Anthonys Valentines Day adventure. We all then talk about why we are terrible people! Dont forget to like Tilted Halo Comedy on Facebook and subscribe to the Podcast!
*stories may be exaggerated or fabricated for comedic effect*

Monday, February 1, 2016

Top 5 Ways To Deal With A Bully

The first thing I am going to say is don’t become a bully yourself!  I am also going to tell you not to do the things that I did, I did not attack my bullies head on but in a round about way that may have traumatized them in a different way. I guess I became the bully that day.  To be fair though, there are different types of bullies.  There is the damaged bully, you know the guy from The Breakfast Club.  That is the guy that needs to inflict pain because he wants the world to mirror what he’s going thru.  There is also the “Alpha.”  Hes not really an alpha but hes taking what he sees to be the path of least resistance to obtaining dominance. The sum it up tho they are both dicks and here are my top 5 ways to deal with them.

#5- Avoid them
This goes without saying and if you’re dealing with a bully its something you’ve already tried.  This may not be the easiest thing but it is much easier that getting punched in the face or humiliated on a daily basis.  Some people may think this is the cowards way out but life isn’t the Roman Colosseum. It is also strategic because simple people get bored of not constantly stimulated so if they don’t have you they’ll find someone else.  I’ve tried this one and I can say its effective, the only problem with it is that it is not permanent.  They always find their way back, even if it isn’t the same guy its another guy, but the same guy.

#4- Talk
Admittedly this doesn’t work that often.  Sometimes tho, the bully is just in pain and is dealing with it the only way he knows how.  I know life isn’t an after school special but a lot of times bullies end up becoming friends with the people they bully.  Weird.  So, just because a person is being a dick doesn’t mean he’s doing it for fun. Treat them like people even tho they don’t deserve it.

#3- Stand up
This is when you’re starting to run out of options.  Most of the time a bully is like a cat just looking for a weak mouse to pounce on.  Most bullies like to feel superior and are looking for the path of least resistance. Nobody wants trouble all the time and that’s what they will get if you stand up to a bully everytime they pick on you. Doesn’t always work but it willy usually do the trick. There used to be a guy that would try to pick on me and every time I would just get in his face and ask him to hit me. Not always the best idea and it didn’t make him go away but he did it less and less until he finally stopped.

#2- Fight (I do not recommend this one)
Sometimes there is no other choice.  Sometimes another person will cause you so much grief that you have no other choice but to put on your big boy pants and throw down.  Usually a person is picking on you because they are bigger than you so fighting isn’t the smartest choice but it could be necessary, when you show you’re not afraid of a bully you take away their power. But since they are bigger than you you have to be willing to take the beating of a lifetime, it may not happen but you gotta be ready.

#1- Be Creative (I do not recommend this one)
Now, this one is my favorite one that’s why its number one.  I do not recommend  this one but it’s a lot of fun.  This one is where you be creative to deal with your bully problem. Not sure what that means huh? Well how about some examples.  When I was in jr high, there was this kid much smaller than me but 1000 times meaner.  He would make fun of me, constantly talking crap. One day I finally had enough and decided to do something but I’m a peaceful person, I don’t like fighting. So it was time to be creative.  I decided to look over his shoulder over the course of a week and get his locker combination.  So when I got it me and a friend of mine went to his locker when the halls were empty and opened it. What did I have planned you might ask? Nothing. I had nothing planned, so I improvised.  I pulled out his sack lunch threw it on the floor and my friend and I stomped on it and threw it back into his locker. Lame huh? I kinda thought so until juice started leaking from the bottom of his locker. It turned out we busted his juice box and he had to pay for all of his school textbooks. But wait theres more. Me and my bully ran in the same circles so this day I ended up having to sit at his table during lunch and watch him eat the lunch that me and my friend had so happily smashed. It was one of the saddest things I ever saw. He found out it was me and never messed with me again.

The moral of this story is don’t be like me and deal with your problems in a productive way. I became the bully when I watched him drink out of a crushed juicebox.  I still think about it… and it makes me laugh and feel sad at the same time

Friday, January 29, 2016

Dj Khaled (parody) Loves Cupcakes and Obamacare!

Dj Khaled has brought us many things and much entertainment! But now he reveals his secret love of cupcakes! this is a compilation video but DJ Khaled still loves him some cupcakes! There are the classics of Major Key Alert to Another One! Enjoy!

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

Finding Out If You Have Super Powers Comic

We all remember being kids and trying to find out if we had super powers. it was an awkward time but you never really believed that you didnt have super powers.  I knew it deep down that if I just believed i could finally do it! So remember kids... just believe and have health insurance!

Monday, January 25, 2016

Top 5 Questions To Ask A Porn Star

If you’re anything like me you are intrigued by the porn industry.  For an outsider there are so many unanswered questions. And I mean beyond the average questions like, “why do you do this” and “what do your parents think.”  The porn industry is much more interesting than that and I would like someone to shed a little light on it for me.  In a perfect world where I got to sit down with some porn stars and pick their brains, I would have them illuminate the weirdest parts of their job.  I’m not looking to judge anyone for what they do because when it comes down to it we all whore ourselves out, its just in different ways.  That’s why I’ve assembled a list of the top 5 questions I would love to ask a porn star if I ever got the chance.

#5- How often do you regret going into porn?
I don’t mean this in a judgmental way, I mean this the way I would mean this if I asked anyone with any regular job.  I used to hate myself everyday before work and on the way to work and on while I walked in to work and while I was sitting there.  It makes me wonder what goes thru a porn stars head while they are headed to work, stressed out and would rather not go in today.  I guess sometime they don’t enter work, work enter them. I made a joke

#4- What is your least favorite thing during a movie shoot?
Even for the most sexual actress there has got to be something they could do without.  I don’t care if it’s the craft services people asking them to put on pants before coming to the table or the shower afterwards, there has got to be something that drives them up the wall everytime they have to deal with it.  Regular actors talk about all the work it takes to do a movie, that means a porn has kind of got to be a bit more work right? I cant be the only one that wonders this.

#3- Whats the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever done on set?
I know I’ve done some stupid stuff during work and I’ve got to wonder what is the embarrassing stuff that happens during a porn.  I once pooped during work and clogged the toilet in a public library so there has got to be some good stories on the set of a porno. Right?

#2-Would you ever attend your child’s career day if so what would you say?
Everyone has kids.  Career day is the day that gets kids exposed to everything that is possible for them to even dream about or just think about becoming.  I would love to watch a porn star, actor or actress, fumble while trying to explain to children what it is that they do. 

#1-If you could talk to your 10 year old self what do you think they would say?
I could only imagine what a 10 year old would have to say to a porn star after you just told them what it is a porn star is, now imagine that 10 year old is talking to themselves after getting out of a time machine.  What would you say to yourself and what would your 10 year old self say. Would past you be disappointed in future porn you?  I would love to talk to my 10 year old self but the conversation would pale in comparison to that of a porn stars.

Those are my top 5 questions, let me know what yours would be.

Friday, January 22, 2016

Dj Khaled - Don't Play Yourself Parody

Dj Khaled has brought some of the most inspirational and creepy videos that have ever hit the internet.  Dj Khaled snapchat and instagram accounts have some of the weirdest content that I have ever seen a sane adult aver post.  I'm not even sure if he is being serious about any of it.  This is me Willy Olguin, with my fake beard and a christmas tree in the back for some reason doing my impression of the soon to be classic, Dj Khaled. Enjoy.

Monday, January 18, 2016

Top 5 Documentaries on Netflix for Creative Type

Inspiration can be hard to come by when you’re a creative type of person. Everyone has their own way of getting inspired.  Every creative is familiar with their own version of writers block. It doesn’t matter what media or expression your art manifests itself in, you know what its like to experience a blockage in your creative arteries.  Whenever I get a creative block I turn to 2 places I like to go and they are Netflix and Youtube.  Youtube is good but quality can be low and you never really know what you’re going to get. On the other hand Netflix has a library of awesome material with a star rating system that lets you know basically what level of content you’re going to get.  The problem with Netflix is sifting through their entire library to find what it is you don’t know you’re looking for.  It makes it that much sweeter when you find something that you can go to your friends with and you know they will enjoy it too.  You are my friends and here is my list.

#5 Stripped
Stripped is a documentary about Comic Strips and their creators.  They interview and talk about the top comic strip creators of comics like Penny Arcade, Calvin and Hobbes, Luann, Foxtrot, Peanuts, Garfield, Pogo, and many more. It’s a perfect documentary for anyone looking for a little comedy writing, drawing, self publishing type of inspiration.  This documentary not only talks about comics with comic creators they also delve into the future of comics as print media is fading out.

#4 Comedians of Comedy
Comedians of Comedy follows comedians Patton Oswalt, Brian Posehn, Maria Bamford, and Zach Galifianakis on a comedy tour called The Comedians of Comedy.  The Documentary follows these leading alternative comedians as they talk about comedy and live day to day on the road.  There are clips of each of their comedy and how the push the boundries of whats known at conventional stand up comedy.  They tell old comedy stories and talk about thing they have been through while they create new memories.

#3 Dear Mr. Watterson
Dear Mr. Watterson is basically a love letter to arguably one of the greatest comic creators to ever live.  The documentary explores the comic strip Calvin and Hobbes and its creator.  The doc interviews people from all walks of life and they discuss how Calvin and Hobbes has impacted their life. They also delve into how Calvin and Hobbes changed and continues to influence comics today.

#2 I Know That Voice
This is one of those documentaries that gives you a peek into something you always wished you could find out more about. Featuring voice actor such as John Dimaggio (Bender from Futurama), Kevin Conroy (Batman), Mark Hamill (The Joker), and many more.  They discuss the process of being a voice actor and making a career with their voices. Some of cartoons more recognizable voices are in it and it’s a lot of fun to see the people behind your favorite characters like SpoungeBob, Tommy Pickles, Bender, and many many more.

#1 Tig
This one holds a special place in my heart because it chronicles the journey of stand up comedian Tig Notaro to notoriety.  This is the documentary that should be called “A Series of Unfortunate events” because it talks about the horrible trials she had to endure that eventually led up to what would be the stand up performance of a lifetime.  Its sound like a bit much but even one of the things she endured would have been overwhelming but she endured.  It also covers her journey afterwards and all the things that came from the bad and are still in development.  On a personal note, the reason this one sticks hard with me is because I was just getting out of the hospital wondering how I was going to deal with the pain and trials I was going through so I was in bed and I turned on Netflix and there it was being promoted in the big window like it was calling to me.  It helped me so much.

This is my list of the best documentaries on Netflix. Enjoy and your welcome.

Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Goku Going Super Saiyan God

Have you ever been sitting at home struggling through a painful dookey when you get the thought, "if I was Goku, would be going super Saiyan right now?"  Then it got me wondering, "would the level of Super Saiyan vary on the level of pain that he went thru. Which then got me wondering, "would Super Saiyan God be at a pain level near childbirth or gnawing off your own private parts?" Personally I think this is what happens during the comercial breaks.  But also since it makes his so much stronger how much force would then the poop come out with. If you dont think this would ever happen then you've never concentrated during a horrifically painful poopoo!

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Why Batman Is The Most Unrealistic Character In The DC Universe

With the new Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice trailer out the debate has sparked again.  You know the one, who would win between Batman and Superman?  This question drives me crazy, why is it even an argument?  Its so obvious that someone with Super in their name should be, I dunno… maybe,  superior to a regular human.  But that’s not even the point of this article, the point of this article Is to prove why Batman is the most unrealistic character.

First off just the notion that Batman could beat Superman is like a little kid bragging about beating his dad at baseball.  Yea he won just because his dad didn’t want to murder him but whatever.  Superman is what every little boy pretends to be and Batman is who every little boy thinks he can grow up to be, the problem is that they are both the same amount of unrealistic.

I don’t mean this in a real scientific way either, I mean he is unrealistic because its not consistent.  Like the Superman example, why can Batman beat the most powerful being in the universe but the Joker is his arch nemesis.  He can beat a super powered alien but a crazy guy with a couple knives is just too much for him, give me a break.  Batmans most dangerous villains are just morning exercise for Superman but you want me to believe Batman is the best… please. 

His money is ridiculous.  There are rich people in the world but why would no one notice that Bruce Wayne is Batman,  just because he dates hot chicks and is in the tabloids.  Its kind of like iron man, if Tony Stark wasn’t so upfront about being Iron Man everyone would figure it out because who else would have the resources and the brains to be Iron Man.  If Batman being as smart as he is and the worlds greatest tactician, wouldn’t the people growing up with him have noticed even if it was just teachers?  They would be sitting around the teachers lounge of the boarding school chatting about Batman and someone would say you know who could have been Batman, he had the brains the money and the military resources, The Wayne kid.  It would just take a mention before it caught wind and the tabloids would be waiting at the gates of Wayne Manor then someone would be persistent enough to notice that Batman always escaped the same way in the same direction, or they would just see the airplane and where it landed.

He knows every Martial Art?  Nobody has this much time! The guy that came up with Batman… and trust me it wasn’t Bob Kane, must have been that little kid you could never shoot with your finger gun because he was always bullet proof or you missed or his mom was calling him or you weren’t watching when he became everything proof.  Either way you put it I hated that kid and it bothers me when a fictional character cant be beaten.  So Batman was supposed to be like 10 Bruce Lees, I don’t think so.  Even Bruce Lee said that unless a person has more than 2 arms or 2 legs its all the same style of fighting. 

Maybe I’m just being a child, maybe I just like Superman way more, or maybe its just too much of a stretch for me… Don’t even get me started on Robin!